Mental Macerations

Today is the first day in a while that I have felt a bit introspective. A bit down. A bit dull and deprived.

Today is a day when I cannot pinpoint an exact reason for it, at least not without significant lies to myself.

Today is a day when I am spun about, craving people and running from their touch, all within a momentary glance.

Today, I stare at this monitor with the keen longing for something that I cannot put my finger to. I can reach out and feel its presence, to the point of determining the fabric beneath the pad of my forefinger and yet...its unreachably far away.

Today I am aware of how simply alone I am, much of my own making. My own making...it will be the death of me.

Today I am frigid, so frigid I can feel myself tighten around the small warm pieces left within my core, clinging to bits for warmth.

Today I visit the back of my eyelids often, perhaps hoping for that glimmer, that spark of something far greater than myself.

Today I am trolling through quote boards, mentally macerating over so many things that I need that outlet.